But Weight!

Feeling extremely bad about life in general and myself specifically at the moment.  Jumped on the bathroom scale this morning, only to be told the inconvenient truth:  biggest you've ever been.  WTF?!  In my mind I have been on a diet.  Of course, no-one and nothing with eyes and common sense would agree with me.  My idea of dieting is to constantly worry about my weight while simultaneously trying to not eat an entire pack of Twizzlers by myself, but to share it with my super-fit, in magnificent shape hubby, who can actually afford to eat sweets.

 

Wish this diet thing came easier to me.  Or came to me at all.  I think the biggest problem is, I am an eater. I like food and thoroughly enjoy the eating experience.  If you have been reading previous posts, you would know this about me already.

 

I wish I was one of those people. You know them, maybe you are one of them.  When life is thrown even slightly off balance, they stop eating and when you quiz them on their weight loss, they drive the knife into your fat-padded belly by saying "Oh, you know, I went through a bit of a rough patch with XYZ and simply lost my appetite".  Grrrrr. 

 

This never happens to me.  When I am happy, I eat.  When I am sad, I eat.  When I had impacted wisdom teeth surgically removed, the first thing I did when I got home 3 hours post-op, was... yup, I ate a full meal. 

 

Had Andrew, Emily and her parents over for a good old South African braai last night.  Didn't eat the Lindt chocolate Easter bunny I put on each plate as decoration and only had one scoop of homemade ice cream.  Why, oh why did I not lose any weight by this morning?  Well, maybe the reason is that the fat faeries really, really like my company.  Or maybe the bathroom scale is a broken liar.  Or maybe, just maybe it's because I eat too much and get zero exercise? 

 

I will be going back to South Africa in a couple of weeks' time.  When I return in June, I hope to not only still fit into my favourite pair of denims, but to start aqua aerobics again; the only exercise I've ever found that made me feel good about myself and actually helped me lose weight and tone at least a couple of muscles in this aging body.  

 

Oh, if only food didn't taste so good. 

 

But for now I am going back to bed.  All this talk of fat, food and exercise is too depressing to face this early on a Saturday morning.